Interview with a (Whiny) Vampire

Interview with a Vampire is essentially a revenge movie. A very dramatic revenge movie with pre-weird Tom Cruise and pre Superstar Brad Pitt in two very important roles. The buzz from this movie is so hot that it reverberates to this day.

For all that buzz there sure is a lot of whining in the movie. So much whining. Brad Pitt's character just cannot handle the fact that he's a life challenged individual. Of course it doesn’t help that pre crazy Tom Cruise plays a crazy Moody person, who's not a person, but a dead thing. The two of them embark on this I hate you no I hate you worse relationship that goes on for quite a while. How long we don't know because after all time is a social construction the vampires don't have to deal with. Brad Pitt talks about this as he whines about being dead to Christian Slater. Christian Slater has gone to find Brad Pitt for reasons we're not clear on because he wants the interview.

Okay right away, I have a question. Actually many questions. But first let's just deal with why in the world is Christian Slater not running from Brad Pitt? Why in the world does Christian Slater believe that Brad Pitt is a vampire? I was alive in the 90s. I don't remember vampires being around. Why does Christian Slater simply believe that Brad Pitt is a vampire? This drives me crazy. It's the biggest pothole I've ever seen! And another thing, Brad Pitt has had over 200 years to deal with the fact that he's not going to die. God, how about some personal growth! I mean the whole time you're supposed to think Brad Pitt is the hero. But no I'm telling you, Tom Cruise is the hero he suffers over and over again as Brad Pitt whines again and again about how he's not dead yet. I mean if I got to look like Brad Pitt circa 1994 for the rest of time, I think I'd be grateful! The savings on medical bills alone would be astronomical!