A Contrast of Great Teeth

Bohemian Rhapsody is an engrossing portrait of the accomplishments of one man’s teeth. It might be the most famous story of a generation. I ask you, did the teeth belong to Freddie Mercury, or does Freddie Mercury belong to the teeth. 

The band Queen was obviously greater than the sum of its parts. But as Bohemian Rhapsody constantly tells us, Freddie Mercury's teeth were the greatest part of all. These triumphs of odontology paved the way for 4 people to be enshrined in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, as well as some pretty cool looking parties. I mean think about it. If he didn't have those choppers he'd probably still be throwing bags at Heathrow airport.

But as great as his teeth were, they were no match for dragon teeth. As great as his voice was, it was not fire. Yes he could get throngs of people to sing a love song to his wife, but he could not make them cower in fear with fiery breath. If you want to see teeth put to good use as with so many other things you have to watch Game of Thrones.

Interview with a (Whiny) Vampire

Interview with a Vampire is essentially a revenge movie. A very dramatic revenge movie with pre-weird Tom Cruise and pre Superstar Brad Pitt in two very important roles. The buzz from this movie is so hot that it reverberates to this day.

For all that buzz there sure is a lot of whining in the movie. So much whining. Brad Pitt's character just cannot handle the fact that he's a life challenged individual. Of course it doesn’t help that pre crazy Tom Cruise plays a crazy Moody person, who's not a person, but a dead thing. The two of them embark on this I hate you no I hate you worse relationship that goes on for quite a while. How long we don't know because after all time is a social construction the vampires don't have to deal with. Brad Pitt talks about this as he whines about being dead to Christian Slater. Christian Slater has gone to find Brad Pitt for reasons we're not clear on because he wants the interview.

Okay right away, I have a question. Actually many questions. But first let's just deal with why in the world is Christian Slater not running from Brad Pitt? Why in the world does Christian Slater believe that Brad Pitt is a vampire? I was alive in the 90s. I don't remember vampires being around. Why does Christian Slater simply believe that Brad Pitt is a vampire? This drives me crazy. It's the biggest pothole I've ever seen! And another thing, Brad Pitt has had over 200 years to deal with the fact that he's not going to die. God, how about some personal growth! I mean the whole time you're supposed to think Brad Pitt is the hero. But no I'm telling you, Tom Cruise is the hero he suffers over and over again as Brad Pitt whines again and again about how he's not dead yet. I mean if I got to look like Brad Pitt circa 1994 for the rest of time, I think I'd be grateful! The savings on medical bills alone would be astronomical!

Rachel McAdams is in a funk.

She's in yet another movie where the man she loves goes off into another dimension. Except this time we get to see the dimensional shifting! That's a terrific improvement over The Time Traveler's Wife. The whole time I'm watching I'm thinking "I wish I could see the dimensional shifting that Rachel McAdams’s man goes through!" Well now I do in Marvel Studio's Dr $trange.

I guess BBC doesn't pay Benedict Cumberbatch enough to play Sherlock Holmes, so he has to run out and do comic book movies. I hope we don't see in The Benedict Cumberbatch $tory which is going to come out in about the year 2050 that Dr. $trange caused horrible heartache and some sort of drug dependency problem.

Hmmmm...Although it totally sounds like an awesome movie! I'm going to call it: The Benedict Cumberbatch $tory is already the early Oscar favorite of the year 2050! I can't wait I'm going to start eating kale now just so I'll be alive to see it!

Seriously why did marvel studios have to give us another Matrix?

Rainy in Glenageary

Rainy in Glenageary directed by Graham Jones feels as though it is an impressionist painting of a crime story rather than a straight ahead true crime documentary. 

It’s a classy way to do true crime. It constantly forces you to ask why do you want to see the gore in the true crime genre? Why do you need the lurid details?  

This crime most likely took place inside of a close circle of young people. Young people we never see, except as a painting. The film tells the story of the unsolved murder of teenager Raonaid Murray in 1999 in Ireland. It feels more honest in this day and age of true crime podcasting precisely because it doesn’t really come out and explicitly offer a theory of the crime.

However the fact that it doesn’t feel sensational does detract. Jones has made a choice to not make the crime more lurid than it already was. Because Jones decided to treat both Raonaid and her circle of friends as the children they were in 1999, there is something missing. But, I keep asking, why did I want it? Murder shouldn't be a past-time, and Jones's effort makes that point over and over.

Ghostbusters

Ghostbusters (1984) was a classic tale of mid-career professional academics who came to a crossroads of sorts in their careers. They had run afoul of that most sacred cow in academia. A sacred cow that was so inviolable that to even question it was to be branded as a heretic and forever cast out of the warm confines of the ivory tower.

What did our intrepid heroes Dr. Peter Venkman, EgonSpangler, Ray Stanz do that so rankled the academic community of Columbia University? They dared expose to the world that ghosts were a very real phenomenon and impossible to ignore.

They set up shop in a derelict fire house and acquired an ancient ambulance to scoot about the City Too Busy To Sleep. But Egon slowly catches wind of a serious spectral problem.

Their problems with the powers that be only amplified as the spectral war ramped up. Civil servants steeped in the cesspool of the early 1980s concrete jungle that was New York City simply did not have time to deal with this supposed spectral war.  

Classic though it may be, director Ivan Reitman made the odd choice to turn a light comedy. A war with ghosts is not a comedy. Existence itself is no laughing matter.